Storytellersunplugged

Now and then I ponder what, exactly, I intend to talk about in these essays and sometimes it comes easily. Well, folks, this time it’s pretty easy. Last time in, I had a bit of a rant regarding charity anthologies and whether or not they were the best way in the world to get your name out there, to help a cause and to offer up your stories.

Touched a few nerves on that one. Hell, I’ll do you one better. I just plan offended a few folks. Now, let’s be honest here. I’ve never much been the sort to feel that my advice is the end all be all. I’ve said that more than one and I stick by it. If you find something useful in my suggestions, I’m glad to be of assistance. If you don’t, I certainly don’t take offense. In the long run it’s just my opinion. I haven’t gone to college to master the English language, nor have I studied the nuances of the publishing field or worked as an agent at one of the more prestigious agencies. Hell, on that last part my track record with agents leaves a bit to be desired.

Despite that, I’ve managed a few sales and I normally exceed the established average for a professional writer by a few thousand a year. I make, dare I say it, a living as a writer. Sometimes not a great living, granted, but a living just the same.

There are plenty out there who are doing better and there are plenty who are doing worse is my point here. That and, as I have already stated, the simple fact that my opinions are merely that. They are my opinions. You don’t have to agree with them. You don’t have to read them for that matter. The decision, just like the choice as to whether or not you want to be a professional writer, is entirely in your hands. At the end of the day, it’s still just advice from a source that is dubious at best.

It is also advice from a professional writer. Let’s get that clear. Same as the vast majority of the columnists here at Storytellers Unplugged, I’m a professional. That means, among other things, that I try to behave by a certain acceptable code of ethics and standards. I try to make sure that I write works of fiction (and sometimes nonfiction) and I sell them for money, or sometimes offer them up as I do here, for free.

Along with that comes a certain level of celebrity (not a very high level, I can assure you) and a perception as time goes on that I’m somehow intertwined with the lives and beliefs of some sort of secret society of writers. Now, not everyone seems to take on this belief, but oddly enough a lot of people do. And it isn’t just me. I imagine several of the other writers on this very board will nod their heads regarding my comments, because they’ve fallen victim to them as well, or watched others fall victim to the syndrome.

Just this last month I received more comments than ever before about one of my essays. Made more comments back than I normally do, too. Not only on this site but in personal e-mails with several people who ranged from curious to positively offended by my stance. Those who asked questions got answers. Those who wanted to tell me what a heartless bastard I am for daring to disagree with the noble and just cause of charity anthologies got a brief comment or got ignored, depending solely on how much attitude was thrown in my direction. And to be fair, I responded a few times when I probably should have left well enough alone.

What can I say? I’m human.

To get this out of the way: No. There was no secret or hidden agenda to my previous essay. It was just what struck my fancy at the time. There is no cabal of sinister scribes dictating what I should say on Storytellers Unplugged, nor is anyone holding my family hostage until I comply with their demands. I do not now, nor have I ever, felt a need to work as the crony for another writer or group of writers. You may rest assured that they could likely find better and more reliable cronies if such a group existed, and I can guarantee you that the vast majority of writers out there don’t hesitate to state their opinions for themselves.

Got it? Good. Now, onto the subject of professionalism.

We’ve gone over this before. I’ll probably write about it again. Professionalism isn’t just about the money. That’s a part of it, to be sure. If I sell a novel I expect professional rates. If I fail to get those rates, I have to deal with the consequences.

Here’s a fact that some of the newer writers seem to miss sometimes. Everything that you do as a writer is with you for the duration of your career. All of it. The good and the bad alike. I’ve mentioned in the distant past a writer who attended his very first professional convention at the same time that I did. I’ve also mentioned that I had not one but two separate editors from major publishing houses point out that I managed to behave myself more professionally than he did. See, while he was knocking back drinks at the bar and trying to cop feels off the editors in question, I was listening to the advice of other professionals and trying to learn the ropes of the industry. Yes, you read that right. He was getting sauced and trying to get lucky at a convention for professional writers.

Two years later when we happened across each other again, he was talking about how he was going to genuflect at the feet of a rather well known author if the man showed up. He was also once again calming his nerves with a few dozen vodka and tonics. Later, he once again made an ass of himself with several females. Later still, he lamented that none of the publishers seemed to take his work seriously and explained that he was considering going the self-publication route. Oddly I haven’t seen him in a while. Perhaps he’s managed to find his niche at Publish America. More power to him. Perhaps you’ve even heard of him. Frankly, I doubt it.

But there’s more to professionalism than that. That’s just the tip of the iceberg. So I’m going to list a few things you might want to avoid if you’d actually like to get anywhere in this business. The significance of this advice is solely dependant on your personal experience, or to quote Brian Keene (inside joke for those of you who’ve followed the whole crony angle from last time around) “You mileage may vary.”

Friends and peers. I love ‘em. I have several writers I am delighted to call my friends. I have plenty more than I’ve never met but whom I admire. On a few occasions I’ve even stepped away from the shadows to defend one or two of them from the lunatic fringe that often seems to come with writing genre fiction. I have made clear on a few boards that there are certain people whom, should I meet them in a public forum anywhere near a few of my friends and peers, I will gleefully punt across the room before I bother to introduce myself. Those particular individuals have made threats in the past that some people take as mere eccentricities. I tend to take them seriously. Aside from that one exception, I do not feel the need to leap to the defense of my friends and peers. Should one of my friends state an opinion that causes said friend a large amount of flack on the bulletin boards, I remain absolutely convinced that said individual is likely capable of backing that statement without my assistance. Why? Because my friends and peers in the industry are professionals. They can take care of themselves, just like real grown ups do. As always, there might be a few minor exceptions, but that’s one of the rules I try to live by. In the event that I simple cannot resist defending said peer, rest assured that I will first check the facts of the situation before making declarations. You may also rest assured that I will restrain myself from making judgments about people I’ve never met or dealt with in those circumstances.

I love a good, lively debate on the boards. Most of the time I find myself agreeing with a few friends and peers and disagreeing with others. That fact does not change my opinions of the writers in question or their ability to write. What does and will continue to color that perception is how they handle themselves in a rousing debate. Act like a child and I’ll treat you like one. Act like an adult, and the same rule applies. The simple fact of the matter is that I haven’t even met half of the people I deal with in person. I may never meet some of them because I just don’t do that many conventions. That’s okay with me. I can accept that. But the way you behave on a bulletin board might be the only interaction I have with you as a fellow writer. So if you throw tantrums online you may rest assured it will alter how I think of you when it comes to any possible future dealings.

Passive Aggressive Behavior is self-explanatory and will be met with prompt dismissal. Once again the idea is to be a professional. Don’t know what I’m talking about? Look it up.

Professionalism is more than just sending a self addressed stamped envelope and writing a good introductory letter. It’s about how you carry yourself not only in person but in public forums. The Internet has made this a much smaller world in a lot of ways. Act like an ass and not only will you make the wrong impression, but I can almost guarantee you that someone, somewhere will not only have saved the comments you’ve made, but they’ll be glad to quote ad nauseum whenever they feel the need. The Internet is a lovely way to guarantee that your cock-ups are a part of the permanent record.

Now, a few people are surely shaking their heads. They can think of a few occasions where a dazzlingly witty comment or a truly savage attack on a writer has gained a certain level of celebrity. Celerity should not be confused with either professionalism or success. You doubt that? How often have you heard someone say that Britney Spears is the perfect example of not only motherhood but success lately? How many people have accused Paris Hilton of self-restraint. True, both of them have money and both of the ladies I’ve mentioned certainly have fans. Neither of them is an example of how life works for most people. Most people don’t have a platinum album or two in their pasts or a family worth slightly less than God to turn to for financial success and if any of the exceptions to those rules is actually reading this with an eye towards taking my advice to heart, I’m deeply shocked. Want another example? Everyone knows who Michael Jackson is. Not many of them are going to ask him to baby-sit their kids any time soon. There is a difference between celebrity and professionalism and there is a difference between celebrity and notoriety. If you can’t make the distinction, then please feel free to go about getting a reputation for yourself. Who am I to stand in your way?

In the long run my words here are merely my opinion. Follow my advice or shove it aside as you see fit. Just do yourselves the kindness of looking up professionalism in the dictionary before you post on a board or respond in a public forum. It could be your career that you save in the process.

James A. Moore